You get that feeling when you read a story you wrote 2 years ago and can’t believe you actually submitted it to a teacher. Reading it to yourself is so embarrassing and awful. That feeling you get when you take another listen to the song you created with the very first BAND you were in. It sounds like a poorer version of CREED. Or that feeling you get when you blow the dust off some old photographs and cringe at the unsightly PANTS you used to wear to school. I at one time in my life have felt all of these feelings. And as PAUL THOMAS ANDERSON wrote in one of my favorite films of all time, Magnolia, “We may be through with the past, but the past ain’t through with us.” Ain’t that the truth? Because no matter how much I wanted to bury those old rave photos of me and my friends (mostly just me), I conveniently forgot that I originally made doubles and the same set is lying in a friend’s drawer somewhere bound to surface again at the most inconvenient time. So what better way to defeat fate than by beating it to the punch?
I’m beginning to post some of the older clips of What Mike Saw, which will inevitably count down to the first episode I ever made. These are going back to 2006 when we lived in a different time so that means embarrassing moments, embarrassing dance movies, embarrassing hair. I look like a Filipino IAN BROWN in this. But it’s okay because I enjoy uncomfortable situations.
This clip #7 isn’t quite to that level of embarrassment, yet, but features some shenanigans and a few celebrities. Most of them are B-rate (Tom Green) but none the less, nice to look at. And make fun of.
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Posted 1 month, 3 weeks ago. 5 comments
I honestly can’t stand cops. I try to give them the benefit of the doubt knowing that our communities need police enforcement but time and time again, you hear a story of some cop with a name like “Hawkins” or “Gutierrez” with a blatant display of abusing power. Since my skateboarding days when I was a prepubescent HUNK, cops would always hassle us. Rarely have I ever seen a cop protect and serve the public. All they are good for is to feed into their own egos and do each other’s HAIR to look cool. In fairness, there have been times when I’ve witnessed police assist people stuck on the side of the road (excluding me) and there were a few cops who let my friends and I off with a warning while skating Walnut High School (home of the MUSTANGS). But they are definitely overshadowed by policeman who really don’t care about your safety, and care more about their quotas.
Now due to the state’s budget crisis with an economy going to HELL, you probably noticed more and more cops on the roads along with those cute ticket OFFICERS cruising around marking everybodys’ tires. More enforcements on the streets aren’t because of rising crime rates but rather to make money off citizens like you and I for petty infractions like jaywalking or bumping Reggaeton music from our cars. Okay fine if you break the law, but the city is willing to extract every last penny they possibly can out of that one violation. A few weeks ago, I got ticketed for parking at a meter after 4PM, which is rush hour time. Actually I deserved that ticket because I too hate it when people use up valuable lane space while I’m trying to rush home to catch the tail end of FAMILY MATTERS. But then here comes the tow truck out of nowhere to take my car to the impound lot. The meter maid was a total prick. But I got the tower to let my car go, but for 200 bones. I asked him, “Hey, you guys are doing this because the city is broke, right?” He just responded with a slight shake of the head yes. That was the most expensive Subway sandwich I have ever bought.
I expect predators to come out of large banks and corporations to squeeze money out of people, but it makes me feel ill to see the same practices coming from our government.
This “What Mike Saw” is dedicated to everyone who has received a ticket for something really crappy. In this episode, you will see a glimpse of how I managed to magically turn a $50 texting ticket, into a $900 headache. I don’t think I will ever talk shite to a cop again. Fucking assholes. Plus this episode has its share of trouble, throw-up, Hollywood parties, boobs, skating, and so on.
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Posted 3 months, 3 weeks ago. 13 comments
Just as HUEY LEWIS did with MARTY MCFLY, we’re going “back in time”. We’re going back to a simpler time when it was okay to be passed out drunk in the streets while your friends mock you. Back to a time when it was sanitary to scam on random girls you meet in a crappy bar. Back to a time when sporting a MULLET was okay and you wouldn’t be ridiculed for having one. Fortunately we all had to grow out of that phase of our lives and even though those were great times, we should be glad they’re over.
What Mike Saw #11, which is a more current representation of the times, will be made next week but before we visit the new era, we must take a look back at part of a decade that seems ages ago. For those of you in this, I’m sure that you don’t even remember these particular moments in your lives. But hopefully these memories do come back and hopefully you won’t be too embarrassed by them.
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Posted 4 months, 2 weeks ago. 7 comments
I’m proud to claim that a few years ago, I invented the term “shiny shirt club”. A shiny shirt club is any club with a one-word name (Mood, Pulse, MAMI, etc.) frequented by bros with SHIRTS that shine. But the shine doesn’t just stop at the shirts. The luster gets carried on in everything from the hair, to the MUSCLES, to the bling. The GIRLS are pretty fantastic too. It’s pretty simple really and we’ve all seen them because we’re constantly bombarded with their exclusive appeal and sweet looking FLYERS. However I never really get invited to these clubs because of the way I LOOK but that’s fine by me. I’m comfortable with who I am.
I must admit though that I am jealous of my brother who took the label one step further, for our people (ORIENTAL), and called the Asian clubs, “SHINESE Shirt Clubs.” Damn that’s good. And that is something I am fond of and wish I were completely apart of.
This is the 10th episode of What Mike Saw. It’s been three years since I put one together. This video is dedicated to all the “Shinese” shirt bros. And it’s also dedicated to the NBA, which I miss very very much.
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Posted 5 months, 2 weeks ago. 11 comments
A lot can happen in three years. Back in 2006, anyone who’s anyone was listening to a prepubescent Jonas Brothers. Everyone I knew had an ANGULAR haircut. Not me. I opted for the BOWL. And the biggest television show of that time was American Idol. The only thing that’s really changed about that show is the SEXUAL ORIENTATION.
It’s been three years since I did a What Mike Saw. Even though I haven’t put anything together since then, it doesn’t mean that I’ve stopped recording. I’ve been capturing EVERYTHING. So don’t worry if you can’t remember what happened that one night you drank so much you woke up in the SANTA’S VILLAGE parking lot with your underwear on backwards. I can probably help you out.
The video below was the very last thing I put together back in 2006.
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Posted 6 months ago. 2 comments
